Week 11 - Reflective Entry

My role as a coachee:

After talking about my experience with my dysfunctional team, my coach asked me if I was planning on confronting “the troublemaker” with the issues we were facing in the group. I told her that to be honest, I didn’t think it would help. Even though I believe he is not aware of the problem, his actions make me feel that saying something will not do any good. I realized that in a way I have given up. As has the rest of my team. Because we don’t trust his abilities (because we haven’t really experienced them), we decided to do some of his part for him, instead of “forcing” him to do it. I know with myself that the best thing would be to confront him, but then I think about the limited time we have left. In three weeks the entire semester here is over, and we will not see each other again.

If this had been a more long-term cooperation, I would have done things differently. And throughout this course I’ve learnt more about how to handle these types of situations, and how to be able to recognize them early on in order to prevent them. I didn’t realize how our group dynamic truly was until I wrote it down for this assignment, and discussed it with my coach. I knew our group wasn’t optimal, but when I saw what I had written and saw how we should have been in the different stages, it really made me realize how far this group dysfunction had gone.

My role as a coach:

My coachee had a very interesting story to tell. I found myself focusing more on what she said then on my role as a coach. So when she was done telling me about her experience, I needed to take a few seconds to readjust and claim my position as coach again. I was able to make the switch, and soon was asking her a few questions. I noticed how she was able to give me very fulfilling answers. And as the observer remarked, she seemed very engaged when answering.

I find that the four key processes of listening, mirroring, questioning and aummarizing comes quite natural now. I find I am genuinely interested in hearing what my coachee has to say, and I also have this wish to help her move forward. The catalyzing part I still find somewhat challenging, but I find that when the genuine interest is there, you have more motivation and perhaps this shines through when you’re having the conversation, leading the conversation to feel more catalyzing.

My role as an observer:

As an observer, I’ve also noticed how my teammates have grown more comfortable in their roles. We all feel safe around each other, most likely because we’ve had to open up and share thoughts that we usually don’t share with other people. And after every session, we tend to discuss what we’ve just talked about, and everyone shares their point of view. I always find this part of the conversation very intriguing, because it helps you see things from another perspective. I think it also makes us more susceptible to listen to others outside the group as well.

Ingrid Elisabeth Sørensen